Tami Talks: Stories to Heal Your Inner Child

*I tried out new mini-microphones for guest episodes and apparently there is a learning curve! So, thank you again for bearing with me as I navigate this "producer" stuff on my own and continue to fail forward!! 
Okay back to this episode where I am taking the advice of Salt-N-Pepa when they sang, "Let's Talk About $eX Baby" back in 1991 and finally having the conversation about the deep connections between sexuality, shame, and self-discovery.
Join me and expert guest, Psychotherapist and Sex Therapist Christie Bemis, as we explore the roots of sexual shame, the importance of feeling safe, and the power of feminine energy.
In this episode, Christie shares her insights on...
How childhood experiences shape our sexual wellness
The challenges women face in embracing their changing bodies
Practical tips for overcoming discomfort around sexuality
Learn how to find your voice, prioritize your sexual wellness, and connect with your feminine energy.
Tune in for an enlightening discussion that promises to empower you to embrace your sexuality, heal from shame, and step fully into your feminine power!
If you want super detailed show notes, here you go! 
7:07: Exploring Shame
8:24: Who is Christie Bemis
10:58 How Inner Child Work and Sexuality are intertwined 
11:40: Sexual Shame begins in childhood 
15:19: How young boys and girls were taught and not taught sex education
18:22: What does shame do around sex?
18:55: Hitting roadblocks of a woman’s changing body
19:50: Why women need to feel safe before feeling pleasure
21:16: Why you are responsible for your “turn on” 
23:45: Where to start when anything sexual feels uncomfortable
25:20: How to explore self touch in a safe way for kids and adults 
25:55: How People Pleasing gets in the way of speaking up
28:50: How to find your voice around what you want and need
29:40: Why putting yourself in community with other women is so important
32:00: How becoming a mother can de-prioritize sexual wellness 
33:33: Allow yourself to get help just like you would go to a doctor if sick
37:40: Why we suppress our feminine energy to stay “safe” or fit in to society’s conditioning
41:04: What envy and jealously are trying to tell you about your own desires
43:08: How feeling unworthy can impact your sexuality and block your creativity, emotions, money, etc.
45:45: How to feel safe within your body and “safe enough” to explore your sexuality
47:50: Why we dim our light and how to stand in it
52:06: Why it is so important to look at your childhood wounds and your relationship with your sexuality
55:33: Why women feel safer operating in their masculine energy and have a hard time receiving
57:53: Why tapping into your feminine energy is so important, powerful, and necessary
59:00: How we can start to tap into our feminine energy
1:02:00 How to find and work with Christie Bemis
As always, if anything in this episode resonated with you, please comment and let us know! 
About Christie: Christie Bemis is a psychotherapist, a $ex educator and relationship coach, an ignite your life mentor, and author. She co-founded and now owns and operates Hot Pink YOUniversity, solo. She is a $ex Educator and Relationship Coach, trained in the Somatica® Method of relationships and intimacy building, as well as certified in Level 1 of John Gottmans work. Her work ignites women and couples to reconnect with passions, purpose and play. You can find her coaching, her book, her wisdom cards and her offerings at www.hotpinkyou.com And all of her links: https://linktr.ee/christiebemis
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Have you ever wondered why some adults struggle with perfectionism, overachieving, or overgiving? The answer often lies in childhood experiences. When a child doesn't feel seen or validated, their ego gets creative to meet this fundamental need. This can lead to patterns of behavior that persist into adulthood, impacting their emotional well-being and relationships.
In this video, we delve into the psychological roots of these behaviors, exploring:
The Role of the Ego: How a child's sense of self adapts when their emotional needs aren't met.
Perfectionism: Why the drive to be perfect can be a response to feeling invisible.
Overachieving: How striving for success and recognition becomes a way to gain the validation they missed as a child. Overgiving: The tendency to put others' needs before their own, hoping to earn love and acceptance.
Problem Child: How Ego can take the need to feel seen to extremes.
 
Understanding these patterns is the first step towards healing and developing healthier ways of relating to your kids, oneself, and others.
 
Please let me know in the comments if something in the episode resonates with you and your Inner Child! Thanks for listening and know that I'm sending you and your Inner Child so much love and healing!!
Want to connect with Tami?
Set up a FREE Discovery Call on her website.
Join Tami's Patreon for behind the scenes exclusives, early offers, and weekly "Tami Tangents" where she rifts on whatever is going on in her life at the time!
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As children, we all yearn to be truly seen and accepted for who we are. However, if our ego fears it's unsafe to be authentic—due to potential ridicule, exclusion, or lack of affection—it develops protective mechanisms that persist into adulthood, compelling us to seek visibility at any cost.
In this Episode:
How my fear of abandonment and rejection got my attention through my physical body.
How physical symptoms could be clues to deeper wounds.
How "setbacks" may actually be a deeper level of healing.
How ignoring your emotions and intuition can feel like abandonment.
How wearing masks to fit in (stay safe) is a form of self-rejection.
How not allowing your kids or yourself to feel all of your feelings is a form of rejection and abandonment.
Stop telling your kids and yourself that "You're fine!"
How my Inner Child left me clues to heal and show up!
 
Please let me know in the comments if something in the episode resonates with you and your Inner Child! Thanks for listening and know that I'm sending you and your Inner Child so much love and healing!!
Want to connect with Tami?
Set up a FREE Discovery Call on her website.
Join Tami's Patreon for behind the scenes exclusives, early offers, and weekly "Tami Tangents" where she rifts on whatever is going on in her life at the time!
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Controlling certain aspects of your life is a coping strategy that your Ego adopted to protect your Inner Child growing up. But that same control that gave you a sense of safety as a child is what is likely blocking you and your blessings now in your adult life.
In this episode, we dive into what happens when we resist change and try to control the outcomes versus surrender to the process and Tami gives lots of real-life examples from when she had to learn these lessons the hard way!
Please let me know in the comments if something in the episode resonates with you and your Inner Child! Thanks for listening and know that I'm sending you and your Inner Child so much love and healing!!
Want to connect with Tami?
Set up a FREE Discovery Call on her website.
Join Tami's Patreon for behind the scenes exclusives, early offers, and weekly "Tami Tangents" where she rifts on whatever is going on in her life at the time!
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Your childhood wounds are NOT your fault, but they are YOUR responsibility to heal. If not for you, then please do it for your kids!
In this episode, I share my most shameful parenting moment and how this work has allowed me to learn and heal from it so I could finally release it after years of carrying around an immense amount of guilt and shame.
I also dive into...
Why parents get triggered when kids waste food
The importance of allowing kids to self-regulate
Why it is important to own your mistakes as parents
Increasing your awareness so you don’t project your wounds onto your kids
How to create emotional safety for your kids by starting with yourself
Please let me know in the comments if something in the episode resonates with you and your Inner Child! Thanks for listening and know that I'm sending you and your Inner Child so much love and healing!!
Want to connect with Tami?
Set up a FREE Discovery Call on her website.
Join Tami's Patreon for behind the scenes exclusives, early offers, and weekly "Tami Tangents" where she rifts on whatever is going on in her life at the time!
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Projections are an unconscious defense mechanism that protects your Ego from facing its deepest fears. Instead, it deflects those fears and insecurities onto others. 
Without realizing it, we project onto one another on the daily in the form of offering unsolicited advice, sharing our opinions, making fun, judging and/or blaming others. 
In this episode: 
Why we feel the need to ask for advice - it’s not what you think!
Why we disconnect from our Intuition in childhood and have a hard time making decisions as adults. 
What Projections are and why people project onto each other.
Why “Fixers,” might unconsciously project onto the person they are trying to help. 
How to explain what Ego and Projections are to your kiddos. 
Please let me know in the comments if something in the episode resonates with you and your Inner Child! Thanks for listening and know that I'm sending you and your Inner Child so much love and healing!!
Want to connect with Tami?
Set up a FREE Discovery Call on her website.
Join Tami's Patreon for behind the scenes exclusives, early offers, and weekly "Tami Tangents" where she rifts on whatever is going on in her life at the time!
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As a society, we love to beat ourselves up over how much we sabotage our efforts, goals, and dreams when it comes to our health, career, relationships - you name it!
But what if self-sabotage is just your Ego's way of protecting your Inner Child?! Tune in to hear Tami's take on what self-sabotage really is and how you can not only learn from it but heal from it!
In this Episode: 
What is Ego? 
The roles your Ego plays to meet your Inner Child's needs.
How naming your "Protective Parts" can help you detach.
Why we fall into "All or Nothing" Patterns.
The importance of taking a "Purposeful Pause." 
The 4 F's and why we automatically revert to them when triggered. 
Please let me know in the comments if something in the episode resonates with you and your Inner Child! Thanks for listening and know that I'm sending you and your Inner Child so much love and healing!!
Want to connect with Tami?
Set up a FREE Discovery Call on her website.
Join Tami's Patreon for behind the scenes exclusives, early offers, and weekly "Tami Tangents" where she rifts on whatever is going on in her life at the time!
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When you've tried "everything" from diets to counseling to therapy - but never tended to your Inner Child! My special guest, Karen, had done an extensive amount of work on herself over the course of 30 years, but still followed her Intuition to find me which led eventually led to Inner Child Work. The path back to love for her Inner Child was her missing piece! 
In this Episode: 
How to shift your shame into healing.
What following your Intuition can look and sounds like. 
What your Protective Ego (Parts) can sound like when they are trying to "help."
The magic that can unfold when you take the time to heal your childhood wounds. 
Please let me know in the comments if something in the episode resonates with you and your Inner Child! Thanks for listening and know that I'm sending you and your Inner Child so much love and healing!!
Want to connect with Tami?
Set up a FREE Discovery Call on her website.
Join Tami's Patreon for behind the scenes exclusives, early offers, and weekly "Tami Tangents" where she rifts on whatever is going on in her life at the time!
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If you find yourself procrastinating, avoiding, or feeling scatterbrained when trying to complete work deadlines or make progress on a goal, you aren't lazy or unmotivated. You likely have unhealed childhood wounds that keep you in a dysregulated state of fight, flight, or freeze.
In this episode Andrea, from Brandhowse, and I discuss how my childhood wounds tried sabotaging my goals and dreams through the process of trying to rebrand my business. Fun stuff!  
Please let me know in the comments if something in the episode resonates with you and your Inner Child! Thanks for listening and know that I'm sending you and your Inner Child so much love and healing!!
Want to connect with Tami?
Set up a FREE Discovery Call on her website.
Join Tami's Patreon for behind the scenes exclusives, early offers, and weekly "Tami Tangents" where she rifts on whatever is going on in her life at the time!
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In This Episode:
The top 5 reasons people don't address their childhood wounds
Why your emotional needs as a kid matter
How your unhealed wounds can get projected onto your kids
How older siblings may be impacted by younger siblings
How to start to validate your own story without placing blame onto your parents
Please let me know in the comments if something in the episode resonates with you and your Inner Child! Thanks for listening and know that I'm sending you and your Inner Child so much love and healing!!
Want to connect with Tami?
Set up a FREE Discovery Call on her website.
Join Tami's Patreon for behind the scenes exclusives, early offers, and weekly "Tami Tangents" where she rifts on whatever is going on in her life at the time!
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Facebook
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